Beverly Hillbillies -- a.k.a. the Rosses

(from Bobby)

Driving from Malibu to the L.A. Airport yesterday morning, Tamie and I had some time to spare. Too much time, you might say.

So, being the inquisitive, highly trained professional journalists that we are, we decided that the Chronicle needed reporters on the scene of the biggest news story in the world. I am talking, of course, about the media circus outside Paris Hilton's West Hollywood home.

So, we headed down Sunset Boulevard through Beverly Hills and Hollywood in search of the paparrazi.

And we kept driving.

And driving.

And, as of this moment, we have flown safely back to Dallas to pick up our children ... driven uneventfully home to Oklahoma City ... and we still have not located the Paris party.

"It's not right!" I say.